Site Move

I have decided to make the move from Blogger to Wordpress based on the features and other capabilities Wordpress offers. All my old posts as well as new will be on that site now if you'd like to follow me there:

notyouraveragepk.wordpress.com 

Have a great day!

-Jesse

Trust in the Gaps of Life

I am dumbfounded as I sit here typing at the end of February 2016. Just at this time last year I was prepping my application to hopefully join the IMB and leave overseas for a few years to share the gospel to those unreached, working under another full time missionary. Yet, here I sit typing in America at the time I was supposed to be gone. What has transpired over the past year? How did we reach this point already? What has the Lord been doing?

Last Spring, as I was applying, I received an email postponing the program I was hopeful in participating in due to budget concerns. This coming a few short weeks before I stepped across the stage and completed my college career. Here I am, one of the most if not the most indecisive people to make life decisions and when one is finally made, I am cut short. I mean yes there was the possibility of leaving like two years from that point, but what do I do in the mean time? What do I do in the gap of this? After much counsel from my parents and others around, grad school was decided. I had a degree that required further education so why not pursue it now.

I began the search once again into the great depths of Google to explore possibilities. Education, medical, etc. So many possibilities lay at my feet. Where is the Lord leading I continually ask and seek; wanting some sign of discernment that I wish would come with great clarity. Bam! Right there. This is what you're supposed to do. Why is that so complicated?

But does God's will work this way? I am wondering to myself, reminding me of the past few years where I sat struggling through the will of the Lord and learned a great deal in how we are to honor and glorify Him. That is His will. That we seek first his kingdom and righteousness. That is what scripture teaches us,

"But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you". (Matthew 6:33 ESV)

So around this time, I traveled to Honduras to serve on a medical mission trip. God opened my heart and eyes even more to the mission at hand and what my place might be in regards to this. Pursue medicine in some capacity and be able to viably serve in most areas to bring the gospel. A new plan and future was in place. Here we go...

But as the end of last summer drew near and those around me began living their new, exciting adult lives, I entered this period of lack of trust. I mean why couldn't I have just chosen this from the beginning? I could already be fully finished with school and be leaving or pursuing somewhere else the Lord would call. Why am I plagued with this regret? Most of the fall I wrestled with this question.

But who am I to question why the Lord has me in this place? Who am I to say to Him, "Lord I really don't think you know what you're doing here." Am I the omnipotent one? Am I the one who created the heavens and the earth? The one who placed the birds in the sky and beasts on the earth? No. The answer is no.

"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them." (Psalm 139:13-16 ESV)

We did not create ourselves. And we are nothing without the Savior.

It has taken the past year with numerous rejection emails from jobs and some even graduate programs to realize it is the Lord who is control. Though I believe I am qualified or even over qualified for some of these things, God has another plan in mind. God believes I should have been placed elsewhere. And isn't it a beautiful thing to come to terms with this and trust in the Lord. That He has placed you where you are. What joy we can have in that!

It is at these points, His grace abounds even more. When we let control (which we never had in the first place) be in the Lords hands and trust that He will remain faithful to His chosen and use us in the way He has predetermined. It is all by His grace that I have begun to learn a deeper trust in Him through this gap year of my life and I pray that we all may begin to grow deeper in this. To trust in our Lord and find complete joy in what He has given in life.

"For none of us lives to himself, and none of us dies to himself. For if we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord. So then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord's. For to this end Christ died and lived again, that he might be Lord both of the dead and of the living." (Romans 14:7-9 ESV)

Come to the Table: 5 Strategic Ways to Pray for Student Life 2015

Here we are again. Student Life Camp 2015 is just shy of a week away for us and the excitement is starting to build. I'm excited to be joining my home church once again to lead these students alongside my mother and another adult leader from the church. I'm excited to see how the youth will grow more in their faith and with each other. And I'm excited to see how the Lord moves through them this week to what will be different as they exit the camp high and enter their lives once again. That is the ultimate goal. That they will continue to be radically changed by the Gospel and that it will influence every aspect of their life. As we prepare, here are 5 strategic ways to pray over the week:

1. Pray for the Students
Pray that the Lord may start working on the hearts and minds of the students now as they prepare to come. That the Lord will work in their hearts to grow a deeper desire for Him in them. That if they don't know the Lord, that He would open them up to His gracious gift of salvation through Him. Pray that they may continue to grow as a community and gain valuable fellowship through the games and time of study this week and the Lord be glorified more and more as they uplift one another as we are called to do.

2. Pray for the Leaders
Pray for the leaders of this week. Multiple leaders from multiple churches from across our country will be joining together this week. Pray that the Lord will work and use us in whatever form He deems fit for His will to be brought and for Him to ultimately receive all glory through our teaching and leading of the students throughout the week. Pray that we may gain rest and have strength because it can become an exhausting week at times. That we may have patience, grace, and love continually with the students and that we may be able to influence them for God's glory.

3. Pray for the Speaker
Pray for the speaker of this week, Tony Merida (brief background can be found here). Pray that the Lord may use Him and speak through Him to reach these students with the Gospel. Pray that he may be humbled before Him as he prepares and brings the Word of our Lord to us this week. Pray for his family as he leaves them this week that they may all have strength and comfort from our Lord during their separation for the week.

4. Pray for the Band 
Pray for the worship band this week, Bellarive. Pray that their hearts may be prepared and put in a place of humility before the Lord that He may work through them as we sing praises to our God. That they may use their gifts continually through the week for the worship of our Lord and He may be honored and praised through our time together.

5. Pray for the Staff
Pray for the Student Life staff, encompassing many college students like myself and many others. This is probably going to be their third or fourth camp of the Summer, traveling week by week, setting up and tearing down stages and game areas and sleeping quarters. Pray that the Lord will strengthen them as they continue on in tiredness and pray that He may continue to use them in whatever measure for His glory as we enter this week. That the students may look to them as examples of our Savior and see how to grow in our faith even more by the example and impact they may leave on them.

Ultimately this week, pray for our Lord to be glorified by our praise and worship and teaching of His word. The games and car rides and time to just hang out with friends is fun, but pray that we may not get distracted from why we are there: to grow in our knowledge of our Lord, to see hearts turned to following Him ,that He may receive the glory due His name with the gracious gift He has blessed us with in knowing Him.

"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen." (Ephesians 3:20-21 ESV) 

Our Call Out of Anxiousness

I am a recent college graduate without a full time job or career path; sifting through the multiple options I have for graduate programs as a former science major. All the while many doors have been presented and have been shut on a daily basis. It would seem that I have a multitude of things to worry and think about. I recently spent the last semester of my college career questioning the degree path that I chose. Gratefully I exited that time broken and humbled before my Savior realizing His great plan for my life is for His glory and for my good. The "good" might be, for the moment, a part time job with a college degree. The good might be continual emails of rejection from jobs. The good might be the constant state of indecisiveness I've experienced the past few years in trying to ascertain what is next.

Now, while I know and understand God's good is far greater than I can comprehend or imagine, a worldly mindset would see it otherwise. I should be in a state of panic and worry as to what is to come. That I should not be content with what is occurring in my life and career path. But, as I am sitting here prepping for the camp I will be counseling at in less than a week, the first lesson begins with the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew, ending in 6:33-34: 

"But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.“Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."" (Matthew 6:33-34 ESV)

To fully understand what is going on here, we must realize where He is coming from. Jesus is addressing the monetary and daily necessities we need to sustain life. He just recently gave them two examples of how God takes care of the birds of the air and adorns the fields with flowers, so why wouldn't He do the same for us, considering we are of more value? (Matthew 6:25-32). Christ is addressing the anxious heart throughout this passage. He confronts our vulnerability toward anxiety with the surety of God's gracious provision. As we come to verse 33, He is calling us to seek His kingdom and righteousness. That is our call and the Lord intends to bring us to a place of reliance and assurance in our Savior.  He will provide for every need we have on this Earth to continue His work.

And then we come to verse 34 where He ends in calling us not to be anxious. That we should not have worries about what lies ahead or anything of the sort. That our anxieties of the future pale in comparison to the Father who knows what lies ahead and has provision beyond our comprehension laid out to meet our needs. This is what I come back to. This is where I stand and hope and trust and wait. The God who calls me to seek Him and His kingdom first, He will take care of me. That I am in my Father's sovereign and capable hands. I am resolved to seek Him and trust in Him. This time of waiting is for a reason. The good in being jobless (full time that is in my field of interest) is that it is preparing me and teaching me full reliance upon our Savior. He is teaching me how to wake up each day, not in anxiousness and fear of what's to come, but in knowing and trusting that today and tomorrow is laid out by His hand. That He holds the future and that tomorrow's anxieties will care for themselves. Let us seek first His kingdom and pursue His righteousness, knowing that He has and He will always carry us with full and complete assurance in His gracious provision. Has He ever failed us? He cannot! (2 Tim 2:13) Though I don't know what tomorrow or next month or next year holds, I know Who it is that holds me and what better hands could there be than the Maker of this world?

A Journey That Lies Ahead

A little over a year ago, I stood with multiple other students at Cross 2013 as David Platt challenged us to consider how we could be used in God's purpose to reach those internationally with the gospel. From that point, it slipped to the back of my mind as I entered a busy Spring semester flowing into the Summer and even Fall. I did, though, share with you all (http://bit.ly/1wtxnip) how God had been moving in my life and calling me into some type of ministry.

Recently, as I have been seeking out formidable options for my future pending graduation in May, I have continually come back to the idea of serving in some capacity overseas for a time, considering I'm single and free from obligation in the US. These thoughts have lead me to the Journeyman project. This a two to three year overseas placement with a current long term missionary to serve alongside them and see what long term missions could look like. It is for 21-26 year olds who have graduated from college and is through the International Mission Board.

After rediscovering this project, I began praying and considering if I could pursue this with my life. With support from my family and friends, I began the pre-application and awaited a response to see if I'd be accepted to move onto the actual application phase. After about two weeks, I received a call and was accepted to complete the application. It is an incredible honor and blessing to be even considered to apply for such a project and see what the Lord may teach me and how He may use me for His glory in this.

So now comes the patient, waiting game. The application is due in August and I will find out in September if I am approved for the next phase that includes interviews and job placement in October and full approval in November. Then if I am fully accepted, I would go for training in January and leave at some point following. This is becoming very exciting and semi-cool to be in a waiting game and going with whatever happens over the next few months. I've been settled in indecisiveness for such a time now and I've reached a point of decision-making and looking forward to what might come. I trust the Lord will work and lead according to His will whether I stay stateside or serve internationally. I pray that I may honor Him in whatever role in which I end up and ultimately pray He receive the glory and praise. I ask that you join me in our calling to serve and make disciples for His namesake on Earth and pray that His will be done throughout the application phase and possible the Journeymen project. As we continue in life and whatever may come, let us remember God's word through Paul in Romans:

"For I will not venture to speak of anything except what Christ has accomplished through me to bring the Gentiles to obedience—by word and deed, by the power of signs and wonders, by the power of the Spirit of God—so that from Jerusalem and all the way around to Illyricum I have fulfilled the ministry of the gospel of Christ; and thus I make it my ambition to preach the gospel, not where Christ has already been named, lest I build on someone else's foundation, but as it is written, “Those who have never been told of him will see, and those who have never heard will understand.” (Romans 15:18-21 ESV)

The Culmination of Indecisiveness and the Future

Some of us have reached the point of culmination where our indecisiveness collides with the end of our college career. We are now, according to Instagram and Twitter, nearly a couple months away before we take those exhilarating yet fearsome steps across the stage to receive the document we have strived for the past four (+) years of our lives. This is great. Really great. So they say. Yet, we all don't feel that way. We have these anxious thoughts and impatience of what might come on the other side of that stage as we exit into the full "adult life." Changing our entire world potentially entering into the workforce or entering school yet again. Right now we have the worries of awaiting the response letters to whether we're accepted into programs or the countless Google searches in hopes that a job opening might appear. And on top of all of that, finishing the coursework to earn the degrees to enter into the abyss of what is to come.

Through all of this though, one thing is sure. One thing has been sure throughout all of our major switches, life goals, relationship triumphs and failures, and the growing periods we have walked through during these trying and fulfilling years on campus: Christ. He has been guiding and shaping us throughout each stage of this journey we have encountered and why would He end now?

We are promised throughout Scripture time and time again of His faithfulness to His people. Throughout the trials Israel faced and the countless times they turned from the Lord, He still remained steadfast.

“Listen to me, O house of Jacob, all the remnant of the house of Israel, who have been borne by me from before your birth, carried from the womb; even to your old age I am he, and to gray hairs I will carry you. I have made, and I will bear; I will carry and will save." (Isaiah 46:3-4 ESV)

He keeps His promises to those He has called. Even after countless generations and failure amongst the people of Israel, the Lord our God bore them still. Carried and saved them. This same God does the same for us. And because of His steadfastness, we can trust in the future and rid ourselves of the anxieties that plague us.

This is a very difficult task. Patience while we await what may happen to us is hard. I am in a period of waiting as I embark on an extensive year application. Waiting can be rough, especially in our nature of doubts and worrisome thoughts of what our lives might become. But when we reach the point of this understanding:

"For none of us lives to himself, and none of us dies to himself. For if we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord. So then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord's. For to this end Christ died and lived again, that he might be Lord both of the dead and of the living." (Romans 14:7-9 ESV)

We are Christ's. What a powerful thing to behold. Our lives are His. He died to save and redeem us and we live to Him because of that sacrificial gift bestowed upon our lives. So our anxieties and worries about what is to come need only to be cast upon our Lord who is the keeper of our lives in life and death.

But this is difficult to do. How do we forgo our nature in worrisome thoughts and doubt?

We begin in prayer. That the Lord would remove our anxieties and we may trust in His everlasting promises that are our's in Him.

We continue through the reading of His Word. To continue in growth and knowledge of what His living word may teach us about His promises and faithfulness as a continued reminder.

We live our lives as we are called. We are placed in certain situations and places on our campuses and have been given certain gifts. So we must continue strong through the end of our times here that we may honor and glorify Him in all things. Then trust in May that whatever happens, He is sovereign and in control. Trust in this promise today my fellow seniors as we continue to the end that is only the beginning of our lives.

As We Gather Again...

December of 2013 a few thousand college students gathered in Louisville, KY for the Cross conference, which stands to equip and mobilize students for their role in reaching the nations with the Gospel. As my readers then, I asked for your prayer over us in how God may shape and fashion us for His calling in this upon our lives and the work He would do during the few days we spent there.

In a few short weeks we will be returning to the conference, but in our respective cities and campuses, simulcasting Undaunted, seeing how the Lord may equip and move in us even more for our role in making His name be glorified amongst all peoples. 

As we gather once again around God's Word to seek understanding and insight into His purposes for missions I ask for your prayer in preparation and throughout in a few ways for those who will be tuning into the simulcast: 

1. Pray for those who attended Cross 2013 and committed to seeking missions as a viable option for what God is calling them to do. As they return, they may still be in waiting to see what is next or in the process of pursuing a missional life internationally and what they may learn through God's Word in preparation for this. 

2. Pray for the new attendees and what God will have in store for their lives as they seek to honor Him. I know personally I grew a great deal at Cross 2013 and I'm sure can learn even more this year. I'm excited to see how the Lord may work through those who have yet to attend and what He may teach and place on their hearts through this time we have together. 

3. Pray for the speakers. As all are very prominent in our Christian society, pray that they may continue to be humbled before our God and used to bring Him glory through the teaching of His Word and the encouragement they are bringing to students calling us to step out in faith and place a blank check before God with our lives as Platt spoke of during Cross 2013.

4. Pray for those already on the field. Pray for the fruitful laborers scattered across the globe who are working patiently and diligently to bring the gospel to those who haven't heard. Pray for their safety in Christ and that they may continue to seek Christ and trust in His sovereignty through all things they face cross-culturally. 

5. Pray for the senders. Pray for those who are called to stay and reach those in their surrounding. And as they reach those placed in their workplaces and cities that God would work in them and provide in a way to where they are able to support and uplift our brothers and sisters serving internationally through prayer and monetary support to where they may continue the work God is calling them. 

I am extremely thrilled to see how God may move and work through us and all others gathering around our screens February 27th to tune into this simulcast. May God be honored and praised by our time together that we will be moved to act in bringing the Gospel to those who have not heard.